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A Rancher to Trust Page 11
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The twins hadn’t been too happy about that. Don’t make hungry babies wait for food. That was one of the first things he’d learned the hard way.
It hadn’t been the last, and he was barely getting started.
“Let me see.” Bailey reached for the paper, and he surrendered it with a feeling of guilty relief. She scanned the handwritten instructions quickly, her dark brows furrowed. “Okay. Nothing here looks too complicated. Just the usual baby stuff. We can manage this.”
We. Dan had to fight the urge to reach over and hug Bailey fiercely with his free arm. Ever since he’d found out he was the sole guardian named for the twins in Colt’s will, he’d been reeling. Finding himself entrusted with the Bar M would have been tough enough. He’d been the ranch foreman, sure, but he’d never been solely responsible for all the top-level decisions.
He’d come close, though, when Gordon’s health had failed him. Dan knew most of the ropes there, and what he didn’t know he could figure out. Yeah, he could manage the ranch, although taking sole charge of Gordon McAllister’s beloved spread was a heavy responsibility.
But the babies? Being entrusted with the twins took everything to a whole different level. He was in way over his head, and Bailey’s quiet assumption that she was in this with him, that they were going to figure it out together?
That brought such a tidal wave of relief over him that if he hadn’t already been sitting down, he’d have fallen to his knees.
But he wasn’t sure exactly what that we meant, and he was afraid to ask. His heart already felt like it had been chewed up by a wolf. He really didn’t think he could handle any more pain right now.
But if it was coming, he might as well meet it head-on. “Bailey? We kind of left things hanging between us before. I guess we need to figure out where we stand now, you and me.”
Bailey looked up from the can of formula she was examining, her expression wary. “Yes, I guess we do.” She set the can on the floor and struggled to her feet, still holding Finn. She retrieved a large brown envelope from a table and handed it to him before sitting back down. “The lawyer finished the divorce papers.”
His heart fell hard. “Is that what you want?”
She didn’t answer him at first. She looked down at the infant cradled in her arms, then back at him. “I haven’t signed them yet,” she said quietly. “But I was planning to. I was going to send them to Wyoming. When you didn’t call for so long, I figured that was what you wanted.”
“I’m sorry about that. I just...things were happening so fast. The hospital wouldn’t let me use the cell phone in intensive care, and then my battery died. I’d forgotten the charger at the cabin, and it took me a couple days to buy a new one. By that time, I was just surviving, trying to figure stuff out. And I couldn’t see any way I could explain all this—” he gestured at the jumble of baby stuff all over Bailey’s living room “—when I didn’t even understand it myself. I figured it would be better for us to talk about it in person.”
He was telling her the truth, just not all of it. Partly he’d been scared to call. He’d been afraid when she heard about the ranch, heard about how his situation had shifted, she’d back away, and he’d lose her. He hadn’t been able to stand the thought of that. So he’d set his mind on getting back here as fast as he could, hoping he’d have a better chance of convincing her if they talked face-to-face.
“It’s okay. I understand how hectic things get when you’re in the middle of a crisis.” She wasn’t telling him the whole truth, either. He could see the hurt in her eyes, hear it in her voice. His silence for the past three weeks had done some serious damage.
He wanted to kick himself.
“I should have called. I’m sorry, Bailey.”
“It’s all right, Dan.” One corner of her mouth tipped up in a smile. “At least you came back this time. That counts for a lot.”
He drew in a slow breath. “I did. But I’ve brought along a good many responsibilities that I didn’t have when we talked before.”
Bailey’s gaze drifted back to the slumbering baby in her arms. “You sure have. And they’re beautiful, Dan. Just beautiful.”
True, but the twins were only part of what he’d been talking about—and honestly, not the part that worried him, at least not where Bailey was concerned. He’d known Bailey wouldn’t blink about taking on a pair of orphaned twins. She was that kind of woman—the best kind, strong and sure and good.
But the rest of it was going to be a much tougher sell, and before he tried, he needed to make sure she understood something.
“Everything’s different now except for one thing. I still care about you, Bailey. I still want to see if we can work things out.” He paused. “You say you were going to sign these papers because you thought that’s what I wanted. It isn’t, not by a long shot. But the question is, what do you want?”
He waited for her answer with his heart hammering. She took her time giving it.
“I don’t know yet.” Her dark eyes reminded him of a doe’s, cautious and careful. “But I think I’d like the opportunity to find out.”
That was exactly the answer he’d been praying for. After three weeks of grief and worry and confusion, the relief that crashed over him felt as crazy and wonderful as a thunderstorm breaking a long summer drought. But mingled in with his joy was a splinter of doubt. There were some important things about his new situation that he needed to make very clear.
Before they went any further, he had to make sure Bailey understood exactly what she was getting herself into—and exactly what he’d be forced to ask her to give up if she decided to remain his wife.
He didn’t like it. But it was what it was, and she needed to know.
“Bailey,” he started, but she interrupted him firmly.
“No, Dan. Please don’t press me for anything more than that right now. We both need some time to process everything that’s happened, don’t you think? Besides, you rushed me into marrying you the first time, and that didn’t work out all that well. We’re going to have to take things slowly. One step at a time. And we’ll see how it goes. That’s the best I can do.”
He stopped short. If he kept talking right now while everything between them was so fragile, he’d likely ruin the last chance he had with this woman. If he waited a few more days, let things settle a bit, maybe the connection growing between them would be strong enough to handle the weight he had to lay on it.
Bailey wanted some time, and he needed it. But that was part of the problem. Time was the one thing he didn’t have to spare. And soon—very soon—he was going to have to explain that to Bailey.
* * *
The next Sunday after the eleven o’clock service, Bailey learned an important lesson: when a couple shows up at church with a pair of unexpected twins in tow, they’re going to get mobbed.
Bailey stood on the side lawn of Pine Valley Community Church, surrounded by women who were exclaiming over the twins and asking all kinds of questions. She didn’t mind. For the past few weeks, she’d been fielding questions about her marriage. This was a welcome change.
Besides, who could blame them? The babies were adorable, even if she did say so herself. She’d insisted on coming over to Dan’s cabin early this morning and helping him get them ready for church. She knew Dan could’ve handled it alone. He was so careful and gentle with the twins that Bailey’s heart melted every time she watched him tending to them. But she’d wanted the fun of dressing the babies herself.
And it had been pure joy. She’d loved every second of the process, even when Josie had spit up all over her pretty pink dress. Bailey hadn’t minded a bit—there was a precious yellow dress she’d almost chosen, and this gave her an excuse to pull it back out. Josie looked every bit as beautiful in it, and Finn looked equally sweet in his little green romper. Bailey had taken so many pictures with her phone that they’d arrived five minutes
late.
Bailey usually fretted over running late, but today she didn’t care a bit. It was a beautiful, perfect Sabbath day. Spring had decided to visit Georgia early. The late-February day was unusually balmy, and the pear tree in the churchyard had already budded out in multitudes of white blossoms. The slim sapling looked like a bride, all decked out in a frothy white dress, waiting for her groom.
That image gave Bailey’s insides an exciting little stir. She looked through the crowd of women to where Dan was standing in the big arched doorway of the church, talking with Pastor Stone and Abel. Jacob Stone and Dan’s brother were nice-looking men, but Bailey privately thought Dan put them both to shame today. He was dressed in khaki slacks and a crisp green shirt that strained a little across his muscled shoulders. It was the first time she’d seen him in anything other than jeans, and she had to say, the man sure cleaned up well.
As if he felt her glance, he turned his head in her direction. He didn’t smile. Smiles hadn’t come easily for Dan just lately. But the sun creases in the corners of his eyes deepened slightly as their gazes caught. Bailey’s heart flipped over, and she had to force herself to focus her attention on the cooing women around her.
“They’re so precious.” Emily had Josie nestled under her chin, the skirt of the yellow dress fluffed out over her supporting arm. “Of course, you know how partial I am to twins,” she added with a chuckle. “And a good thing, too, since I don’t seem to be able to have anything else!” Then she sighed. “It just breaks my heart, though. About their parents, I mean.”
“I know.” Bailey bounced Finn, who’d begun to squirm in a way that meant he was about to start fussing. “The accident was a horrible tragedy.”
She kissed the top of Finn’s fuzzy head. The McAllister twins had stolen Bailey’s heart from the first moment she laid eyes on them, and the attachment was only growing deeper. If things worked out with Dan, Bailey would instantly have the family she’d dreamed about for years.
But the joyful hope budding in her heart brought some guilt along with it. The twins would never have come to Georgia if it hadn’t been for that terrible accident. She’d never met the McAllisters, but from everything Dan said, they’d been wonderful people.
“Yes, it was a tragedy.” Natalie Stone reached out a finger and touched the frill of lace on Josie’s tiny sock. “But our God specializes in bringing great good out of even the worst situations.” The pastor’s gentle wife smoothed the fabric of her simple dress over a baby bump that was just beginning to show and smiled. “I know that firsthand. I think that’s what we need to focus on now—our confidence in the blessings the Lord will bring about for these little ones. I expect you’re going to be a big part of that, Bailey.”
“I hope so.” Bailey threw a grateful look at her friend, who was living proof of God’s goodness in tough situations. As a brand-new Christian, Natalie had been jilted at the altar by her irresponsible fiancé—and she’d been eight months pregnant with her son, Ethan, at the time. But God had turned that disaster into a blessing beyond imagining, and now Natalie was happily married to Pastor Jacob Stone.
Natalie’s quiet words helped. Bailey felt the lingering guilt ebbing away. She couldn’t change the past. But maybe, just maybe, like Natalie had said, she could be a joyful part of the twins’ future.
Alongside Dan.
She drew in a deep breath of air scented with the sweetness of spring blossoms and baby shampoo and felt tears pricking at the back of her eyes. She blinked hard and smiled brightly. “Isn’t this weather amazing? You’d never know it’s February.”
“It is February, though.” Arlene Marvin, the church’s elderly secretary, edged her way through the crowd. “No matter what that foolish pear tree happens to think. Winter’s not done with us yet, and those blossoms are going to get frost nipped, you mark my words. And Cora Larkey told me to tell you those blueberries you’re so fond of are blooming out, too, more’s the pity.”
Bailey frowned. “So early?” She loved the heritage blueberries that grew on Lark Hill Farm. They were always a huge hit at the store, and she had contracts to provide them to several area restaurants, as well.
“Yes. Our next frost’ll get them for sure, but like this silly tree, they couldn’t resist a false spring.”
“You never know. Maybe spring’s truly come early this year, Arlene,” Bailey said. She realized she didn’t much care either way. Blueberries and pear blossoms were small losses compared to the sweet hopes that had started to nestle in her heart.
“I doubt that. We’re bound to get one more hard freeze before warm weather sets in for good. We always do. Now, Natalie, you need to get out of this sunshine and go sit down. You’ve been on your feet long enough. You know what Doc Peterson said.”
“All right, Arlene. I’m going.” Natalie gave Bailey and Finn a hug. “I’m praying for you and Dan and these sweet, sweet babies,” she murmured. “Every single day.”
Lois Gordon, who’d been lingering on the outskirts of the group, snorted. “Somebody’d better be praying,” she grumbled. When the other women shot warning looks in her direction, Lois squared her shoulders. “Stop glaring at me. Nearly everybody in town’s thinking it. Somebody might as well say it to her face. We’re worried about you, Bailey. You’re a good person, and we all care about you. But Daniel Whitlock is a cat of a different stripe. I know that’s probably not what you want to hear right now, but it’s the truth. And if you can’t speak the truth in the churchyard, where can you?”
Emily lifted her chin, a sure sign that she was gearing up for battle. “I’d say if you can’t show a little Christian mercy and forgiveness in a churchyard, where can you?”
Lois tightened her lips, and tears glimmered in the older woman’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Emily. I know he’s Abel’s brother, but they’re nothing alike, never have been. Daniel took after their skunk of a father. You and Abel mean the world to me, but I’m worried about having a bad influence like Daniel around my grandchildren.”
“Dan had his issues in the past, but people can change, Mrs. Lois. Dan’s wonderful with the twins, and he’s been nothing but honest and kind to all of us since he’s been back in town.” Bailey spoke firmly, pitching her voice so that everybody nearby could hear. Lois was right about one thing. She was only saying what a lot of people were thinking. Bailey had heard plenty of those opinions while Dan had been gone.
It was really frustrating and very unfair to Dan. Given what he was going through right now, the last thing he needed was more of this kind of thing.
Bailey was getting pretty sick of it herself.
“I suppose people do change sometimes, but it’s very risky to stake your future on it lasting for very long. Time will tell, that’s what. In the meantime, the less time he spends around my grandchildren, the happier I’ll be. And I certainly wouldn’t rush to toss out those divorce papers if I were you, Bailey, no matter how cute these little babies are.”
“Don’t you worry about Bailey,” Anna Bradley said firmly. “She’s not rushing into anything. She’s far too smart for that. She’ll take her time and make the wisest possible choice.”
A murmur of agreement came from many of the women. But not all of them. Bailey couldn’t help noticing the worried looks some of the ladies shared.
She straightened her shoulders. So what? She couldn’t blame them for having the same doubts she’d struggled with herself.
Although ever since Dan had come back with the twins, those doubts seemed to be getting scarcer. It wasn’t hard to see why. There was something so endearing about watching Dan push his own grief aside as he tried to learn how to take care of the orphaned babies. Like yesterday at the cabin, when she’d caught him scrubbing at his wet eyes with one shoulder while he struggled to dress Finn in a Daddy’s Little Rancher onesie.
She’d come alongside and showed him how to roll up the tiny outfit before pulling it over
the squirming baby’s head. Standing so close to him, seeing the soft warmth in his eyes as he thanked her for helping...well. She wasn’t quite ready yet to name what she’d felt at that moment, but one thing was for sure.
It hadn’t been doubt.
“Hello, ladies.” A deep voice spoke suddenly, and she looked up to see that Dan was edging gently through the women. “Hi, Emily.” He nodded at his sister-in-law, who offered him a warm smile over Josie’s head.
Everybody wasn’t as welcoming. An uneasy silence fell, and several of the women backed away from the group and began to make embarrassed goodbye noises.
Dan’s friendly expression faded into a determined politeness. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt. I was just wondering if you were ready to go, Bailey. The twins will be kicking up a fuss to eat soon.”
“Yes, I’m ready.” She couldn’t tell if Dan had overheard any of the women’s remarks, but from that look on his face, it didn’t matter. He’d clearly picked up on the guilty glances the women were tossing around.
Bailey’s heart sank. So far Dan had quietly accepted everything this town had thrown at him, but Pine Valley’s lingering suspicions had to bother him. He’d come back to his hometown grieving and trying his very best to parent two orphaned babies, but people were still giving him sideways glances.
He deserved so much better. From all of them.
Dan had come up in front of her and was reaching for Finn. Before she thought better of it, Bailey went up on her tiptoes.
And for the first time in well over a decade, her lips met Dan Whitlock’s.
She heard the swift intakes of breath around her, but the women weren’t the only ones caught by surprise. She felt Dan startle, for just a second. Then the arms that had been reaching for the restless baby went around her waist instead and pulled her into the warmth of his kiss.
The feel of his lips on hers was at once sweetly familiar and unsettlingly new. Her heart hammered furiously as emotions she’d kept dammed up for years broke free and washed over her like a waterfall.